Why would a busy mum start a business? Does it get easier?
Many people might wonder why on earth a busy mother would decide that now is the right time in her life to start a business?! But here’s the thing: motherhood changes our brains, forever! And some of those changes include making mothers more disciplined and more ambitious, increasing our endurance and giving us a renewed sense of mission in life.
All of those qualities in the brain can make mothers more determined than ever to start that thing.
Of course, there are different personality types. Some women who are more nurturing and go-with-the-flow can embrace mothering alone as giving them a sense of purpose and satisfaction in life. Whilst other women who might be more maverick and Type A can find themselves chomping at the bit to take the next step in their career.
There is no right or wrong way to do motherhood. The only rule - the golden rule - is to do what brings you peace and joy.
So if you do want to start a business, or keep working on your business, go for it! There is no need to conform to any stereotypes of what a ‘good mother’ looks like.
But also be prepared for some hard yards... Running a business WHILST having small children is not the easy option.
Full disclosure: My business is falling apart a little bit right now. I've run out of blog posts (I usually write a few months in advance). I sent so much work to my team that they ran out of time only halfway through the month. And I’m draining my business bank account quicker than I am refilling it.
The problem is… I'm a mum, and you'll all understand what that is like! We had school holidays, my husband went to Canada, my parents went to Bali (jealous!), and my nanny got gastro AND the flu at the same time. And because it never rains but it pours, my baby got bronchiolitis and I haven’t slept in a month (and my sleep standards are not high!)
Update: I wrote this article in 2017 and things have changed a lot since then!
Does running a business ever get easier?
But I’m not here to tell you my sob story. I just want you to know that if you are feeling a bit like this right now too, I can relate.
If you are running a business and wondering when it will get easier I have some bad news for you, it won’t!
One of my favourite sayings for running a business and breaking through money blocks is "New level, new devil." Each time I stretch my business to the next level I encounter a new set of challenges. Even though my monthly income may be getting higher, so are my monthly expenses.
In fact, running a business is a bit like being a mother. It's one of the biggest personal development journeys I have embarked on! It’s exhausting, it stretches me to my limits, it’s rewarding, and it’s fun! It’s freaking hard running a business and being a mother but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
But the good news is that YOU will get better at business. Soon you'll be able to breathe on the rollercoaster instead of gripping so hard that your knuckles turn white.
You’ll develop a bigger sense of humour about the curveballs life throws at you.
You’ll stop taking rejection and failure so personally and get back on the horse a little quicker each time.
You’ll have a big picture view of the ups and downs, so you'll know they are only temporary.
I’m better at breathing through the ups and downs. Plus I don't take my success too seriously. Staying calm and detached about it all helps me keep the ‘catastrophes’ in perspective.
Here are a few practical tips for when you feel like it’s all too hard.
Remind yourself of your bigger mission
Some days I’d much rather stay in bed and watch TV and eat chocolate, so sometimes I need to remind myself that it's worth it! I try to remind myself of the value of my work, and use this as an energetic anchor to continue putting one foot in front of the other.
For example, I got an email yesterday from a gorgeous old client who is now pregnant with her fourth baby asking me to be her postpartum doula again! Happy days!! This is the same woman who was shocked and nervous when she found out she was pregnant with her third, and after working together felt so wonderful and blissed out that she said she was considering having a fourth baby, and here we are.
Run a marathon (not a sprint)
There is no such thing as an overnight success. It takes time and consistent action to create consistent revenue. The key is creating your business to suit you, so that consistent action is sustainable and achievable, and you don’t feel like you are constantly swimming upstream.
If you don’t love social media, don’t make that your key strategy for business growth. If you love cooking, then create a business model where you get to do more cooking.
The secret to success is not burning out, so be a great boss to yourself and design a business model that works to your strengths.
Build your village
Running a business can be lonely, and it can be hard to find friends to talk to about the unique challenges you face as a business owner. It can be really valuable to find some like-minded business owners to share the highs and lows with, and talk through strategy and decision-making.
I scraped together my last coins this month and joined a new mastermind group. My last group lapsed when I had my third baby and now that my baby is nearly one-year-old I know the sure-fire way to breathe new life into my business is to get some accountability buddies.
Make a time commitment
I am all too familiar with burning the candle at both ends. When I first started my business we were pretty broke. I had no spare money for a nanny or a co-working space. I didn’t even have an office in my small home and just worked from the kitchen table. Nights and weekends were the only space I could carve out for my business during some stretches.
Yes, it was stressful, but it made me happy! It was hard to carve out a few hours in my week, but when I did it was ultimately energising, and made me a happier mum too.
Now we are doing better financially, so I am joining a co-working space and getting my nanny on for an extra day a week. And right now I’m sitting in a cafe at 7 am whilst my husband gets the kids to school and writing my next batch of blog posts. I get to drink coffee without my kids interrupting a bazillion times.
There are definitely benefits of being a business owner and a mother.